Visiting Nurse Service & Hospice of Suffolk holds tree lighting ceremony for those who died recently in hospice care

More than 100 grieving family members and caregivers waited patiently on a chilly Sunday evening for a glimpse of the bright lights that adorned five large trees in front of the Visiting Nurse Service & Hospice of Suffolk headquarters in Northport.

All together, the families counted down from five before the bright white lights illuminated the dark November evening.

"The first thing I felt was hope," said Rachel Gallagher, who lost her 85-year-old father, John Peter Weiner, last month after a battle with dementia. "Hope for a positive future. Hope for a happy future, strength to go forward and figure a new way of life without the person you lost."

Four years ago, Gallagher also lost her husband, Kevin Gallagher, 46, to cancer. He also went through hospice care and just last year her daughter, Madeline, was awarded a scholarship from the organization to become a nurse. She said the organization has become like "family" to her.

For more than three decades, officials from the Visiting Nurse Service & Hospice of Suffolk have hosted an annual ceremony, where the trees in front of the building are lit up to honor those who have died in the last six months in hospice care.  A ceremony is held around Mother’s Day to honor those who died in the other six months of the year. 

Before the lighting Sunday evening, members of the hospice team took turns reading the names of 380 people who have died between April to October. Some family members followed name by name as they were read, others looked straight ahead and reflected, while one man wiped his face with a tissue.

"We are here to honor their life and their journey and to celebrate the beautiful souls that we took care of while they were with us," said Erika Silverstein, a veteran social worker with the Visiting Nurse Service & Hospice of Suffolk. 

The event is hosted every November, right before the holidays, during a period that is difficult for many families grieving from loss, officials said. Music is played at the event, religious leaders give words of encouragement and the Northport Pipe and Drum Band close out the evening.

Silverstein, who works with hospice patients daily, said she thinks these type of events help bring closure to families.

"We want people to feel like they’re not alone, especially during the holiday season," Silverstein said.

Visiting Nurse Service & Hospice of Suffolk is a nonprofit that provides hospice care and other related services to hundreds of families in Suffolk County, the organization’s CEO Silvia Cota said.

"We really want to provide that service to patients, who are at the end of life, and make sure that they are comfortable and that they retain their dignity," Cota said. "This event honors our hospice patients."

Cota said the nonprofit offers inpatient service, home care, social work and hosts bereavement groups, among other services.

Cota, who lost her mother Dina Cota last year, said this event has special meaning for her. It’s her first tree-lighting ceremony since joining the organization in the summer.

"It’s nice that we can do this and be an anchor for some people," Cota said.

Not only does the organization provide support to families, but it serves as a motivator for people to join the cause.

Carolyn Sciarrino joined the organization as a volunteer more than a decade ago. Both of her parents went through the organization’s hospice care about 15 years ago. They died within four months of each other, the former nurse noted.

"The experience was very humbling," she said. " ... I wanted to pay back all the good things that they did for my mom and dad at the end-of-life care."