Moving back to Long Island: High cost worth it for many wanting to come home

Gianna Wilson said she reached a point in 2019 where she just felt "over" Long Island. At the time, she and her family were living at the Avalon Huntington Station for about seven years, and they were ready to stop renting and buy their first home.

"A lot of older people would tell us, 'Oh, I should have left Long Island years ago,' " said Wilson, 37. "A lot of miserable commentary, and we believed it. I was like, I want to get out of here."

After considering Arizona for its lower cost of living, the Wilsons decided to pack up and head to Wellington, a town near Florida's West Palm Beach, based on their familiarity with the Sunshine State as well as having family members there.

Gianna is a 37-year-old stay-at-home mom to three kids, her husband, Brett, also 37, is a district sales manager for an equipment and tool rental company as well as a volunteer firefighter for the Huntington Fire Department.

The family's move went off without a hitch, with all of their moving expenses covered by Brett's employer.

You don't realize until you go somewhere else and you're like, wow, Huntington is expensive, but it has it all and it's worth it. You get what you pay for.

— Gianna Wilson, of Huntington

At first, Gianna Wilson said her family loved life in Wellington. But it wasn't long before they soured on their new home, due to the slower-paced lifestyle, a dearth of good food options and a lack of economic opportunities, she said. So about a year after their big move to Florida (when their lease ended), the Wilsons returned to the shores of Long Island.

"Moving to Florida really put into perspective how much we love Long Island, especially Huntington," Wilson said. "It's one of those things you don't realize until you go somewhere else and you're like, wow, Huntington is expensive, but it has it all and it's worth it. You get what you pay for."

New York's shrinking population

Long Islanders often cite the cold winters, chilly politics, snail-paced traffic and high housing costs and taxes as reasons they want to move away, perhaps to another state that has none or only some of these drawbacks. The number of people who followed through on making that big move ticked up over the past few years, especially in the aftermath of the pandemic and the lockdowns that followed.

Between 2020 and 2023, New York saw more than 800,000 of its residents move to other states, the most of any state by share of population, according to Census Bureau records. Long Island's share of these out-of-state movers was small, with Nassau accounting for a loss of 14,502 residents and Suffolk 2,724 residents.

People returning to New York after moving away is likely a rare phenomenon, but one that "never used to happen at all," said Geffen Rodik, director of marketing and self-storage at Woodbury-based moving company Men on the Move. There are no official numbers tracking these boomerang moves. However, an anecdotal survey conducted by Lucky To Live Here Realty, based in Cold Spring Harbor, found that out of 61 respondents, 41 people said they'd move back to Long Island if they could, but most couldn't because of the cost or due to work. Still, it's far from unheard of.

"I hear stories all the time about people who were lured by the promise of low-wage employees and tax breaks from southern states," said Lawrence Levy, executive dean of Hofstra University's National Center for Suburban Studies. "Eventually, they realized that Long Island, with its better educated workforce, its nearness to the city and its shoreline and parks, etc., was a better place to do business."

They're being caught off guard with these high insurance premiums that really almost outweigh the tax benefits.

— Geffen Rodik, Men on the Move director of marketing and self-storage

Rodik said that Men on the Move has relocated Long Islanders to the Carolinas, Georgia and Florida — states that promise lower costs of living and smaller tax bills — only for those customers to be caught off guard by another expense.

"When asked, 'Why are you coming back to this snowy, high-tax region?' A lot of people were saying it's insurance," he said. "They're being caught off guard with these high insurance premiums that really almost outweigh the tax benefits."

According to Bankrate, the average premium as of October for $300,000 in dwelling coverage in New York was about $1,735 per year, compared to $2,368 in South Carolina and $5,527 in Florida (which was edged out of most expensive in the country by Nebraska).

I believe the No. 1 reason that people return is familiarity.

— Lawrence Levy, executive dean of Hofstra University's National Center for Suburban Studies

Costs aside, the most probable reasons for people to return to Long Island are to be closer to family members, for their career or they had gone away for college and are now just coming back after working in a different state, Levy said. Of course, there's also the aspect of coming back home after time away.

"I believe the No. 1 reason that people return is familiarity," he said. "Whether it's just knowing where things are and how to get to them, or even how to prepare for the weather."

'Absolutely tickled to be back'

Frankly, 10 years ago, if you would have asked me, 'Do you want to move back to Long Island?' My response would have been, 'No way, I'm not moving back to that tax-infested rat race.' 

— Ray Baule, of Kings Park

Familiarity proved a powerful pull for Ray Baule, 60, who moved back to Long Island in 2020 after 27 years living in other states. The neurosurgeon, who grew up in Amityville, lived in Pennsylvania and California before settling down in North Carolina for 18 years. Upon the initiation of a divorce and a growing sense of boredom with the state, Baule sought to move and get a new job, looking at positions in Maine, Connecticut, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, upstate New York, South Carolina and Florida. Long Island wasn't even in consideration — even though he still visited a few times a year to see family and attend shows.

"Frankly, 10 years ago, if you would have asked me, 'Do you want to move back to Long Island?' My response would have been, 'No way, I'm not moving back to that tax-infested rat race,' " he said. "I had kind of resolved that I wasn't going to be moving back here."

Baule said his daughters, age 18 and 20, changed his mind. Although they didn't grow up on Long Island, they visited family members here at least twice a year and became familiar with it. After renting a house in St. James, Baule purchased a home in Kings Park for $900,000, about double the cost of his North Carolina home and a quarter of the size. His annual North Carolina property taxes were about $3,500 — now he’s paying about $18,000 — while the price of his homeowners’ insurance coverage went up by $3,000. The costs have been worth it, he said.

"I wasn't here two weeks before I was just absolutely tickled to be back," Baule said. "There are problems and pitfalls everywhere, but for me, my personality, my quality of life, this is where it is. Anywhere I am on Long Island, I can get down to the beach. It has everything I want."

Completing his education is what originally brought Nicholas Genco, 36, who grew up in Rockland County, to Long Island. But it was the friends he made along the way that brought him back after he moved to Massachusetts for his career.

The thing that we were missing most when we were in lockdown was friends and people our age, the social life. That weighed heavily on our decision. We ended up coming back to Long Island.

— Nicholas Genco, of Rocky Point

A computer science major at Stony Brook University, Genco lived and worked on Long Island for about four years before getting a job in early 2019 just outside of Boston (his employer paid for the move). Genco and his wife, whom he met the first time he lived on Long Island, had a "great 2019," but when the pandemic hit, they found themselves in lockdown and working remotely, considering their future.

"We just said, the thing that we were missing most when we were in lockdown was friends and people our age, the social life," Genco said. "That weighed heavily on our decision. We ended up coming back to Long Island."

Using the money they saved during lockdowns, cashing out some of Genco's company stock and taking advantage of low interest rates, the couple purchased a 1,400-square-foot ranch in Rocky Point for $475,000, $45,000 over the asking price.

"I love it here. The summers are incredible, the proximity to the water and the beaches is great," Genco said. But, he acknowledged, "I understand that I got lucky. Not everyone is in the same position as my wife and I are."

'If people can afford to move back, they will'

Genco, Baule and Wilson all returned to New York amid the pandemic, when competition for houses was high.  Wilson said the family was able to save enough money for a house because their move was mostly covered by her husband's employer, and paid less rent after they returned to Long Island by living with relatives.

"We were able to gain our bearings and figure out what our next move was and save a little bit," she said. It was during this time that the family started watching the market. "When we were renting originally in Avalon Huntington Station, my kids went to a school called Flower Hill in Huntington Bay," she said. "I would come to this area all the time and be like, one day I want to live there."

When a midcentury California ranch in the area priced at $750,000 came on the market in October 2021, Wilson was skeptical they'd be able to afford it. But her husband pushed her to take a look. They immediately put in an offer about $30,000 under the asking price, and were surprised when the owner came back with a counteroffer of $730,000. The Wilsons went ahead with the transaction, using the four-month-long processing period to "scrounge together whatever we needed to make it happen" by the closing in February 2022.

For people to sell their places down south or out west, unless they get jobs with substantially more money, it's hard to move back.

— Brigid Marmorowski, Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty licensed salesperson

Brigid Marmorowski, a licensed salesperson with the Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty's Garden City office, said that while the Long Island market has cooled in some areas since the pandemic days, certain neighborhoods are "extremely hot." In her experience, people who missed out on buying a home two years ago are now regretful, facing both higher prices and higher interest rates. These challenges are larger when moving from another state.

"If people can afford to move back, oftentimes they will," said Marmorowski, who worked with three clients who returned to Long Island after moving south. "But for people to sell their places down south or out west, unless they get jobs with substantially more money, it's hard to move back."

'I just knew that I couldn't stay on the Island'

You're a thousand miles away and it's really hard to love your family from a distance. But I knew that everything I was doing was to get back to them.

— Melanie Corinne, of Port Jefferson

Lifelong Long Islander Melanie Corinne, 32, and her husband, Dylan Damboise, found a different route to homeownership, one that took them to another state for five years: they joined the Marines.

"Growing up, my family was only able to stay here because of financial support or help from their family," she said. "We were luckily able to stay, but from a very young age, I had this feeling that there's a time limit on it, like there's a clock, which is a [bad] feeling to have."

After graduating from Suffolk County Community College in 2012, the Stony Brook native said she found herself with no job prospects, which meant she did not have the means to remain in the only place she called home.

"I wanted to be able to give back and to take care of my family and my friends the way that they took care of me growing up," she said. "I just knew that I couldn't stay on the Island if I was going to do that."

The high school sweethearts turned to military service starting in 2013 to build life skills, get work experience and save money, because housing is covered and food is subsidized for service members. The Marines appealed to them because the branch is known for being intense and only accepting the most elite recruits, and it would allow Corinne to use her language skills. She eventually served as an Arabic linguist in the Marine Corps' intelligence division.

"You're a thousand miles away and it's really hard to love your family from a distance," she said. "But I knew that everything I was doing was to get back to them."

Things went exactly according to plan. The couple served for five years and were able to save about $80,000. After returning back home, Corinne worked as a veteran peer specialist, before starting her own consulting business doing veteran advocacy and support.

We drove past this house all the time and fell in love with it. I never imagined in a million years that would be the house I'd be living in.

— Melanie Corinne

"Being a veteran has been wonderful for exactly what we intended," she said. "There's a lot of luck and a lot of privilege in my story. Certainly I acknowledge that not everyone can join the military. So this solution that I found to stay in proximity on the Island of people I love is not necessarily accessible to everyone."

Corinne and her husband purchased their three-bedroom Port Jefferson home in 2022 for about $650,000 after seeing three homes. They tapped both their savings and a VA home loan to close the deal. As chance would have it, one of the sellers was a Navy veteran, which Corinne said "felt like a passing of the torch."

Growing up, "we drove past this house all the time and fell in love with it," she said. "I never imagined in a million years that would be the house I'd be living in."