'Road House' review: Remake of Patrick Swayze's cult classic has its own charms

WHAT IT’S ABOUT Jake Gyllenhaal plays Elwood Dalton, a former UFC fighter so fearsome that he now wins bare-knuckle boxing matches simply by showing his face. Impressed, bar owner Frankie (Jessica Williams) hires him to clean up the Road House, a watering hole in the Florida Keys overrun by bikers and brawlers. No problem — until Dalton learns that a local crime-boss, Ben Brant (Billy Magnussen), wants to turn the bar into a drug front. Between falling for a local doctor, Ellie (Daniela Melchior), and dodging the corrupt sheriff who happens to be her father (Joaquim de Almeida), Dalton will find himself fighting for something more than just a paycheck.

MY SAY Whenever people try to name the cheesiest, most ludicrous action flick of the 1980s, you can always one-up them with “Road House.” Starring Patrick Swayze as a legendary bouncer with martial arts skills and a philosophy degree from NYU, the movie is essentially a samurai epic in stonewashed denim, lit with neon and scored by a white-boy blues soundtrack. It's the kind of macho fantasy you’d be embarrassed to reveal even to your shrink — which is probably why it’s so thoroughly entertaining and utterly satisfying.

There’s no way to match that cult classic, but director Doug Liman (“The Bourne Identity”) is willing to give it a try — or at least put his own stamp on it.

Working from a new screenplay by Anthony Bagarozzi and Charles Mondry, Liman turns “Road House” into a slick and slightly noirish thriller. Dalton is no longer an implacable Zen butt-kicker but a loner with a guilty conscience, the result of a professional fight that went too far. Gyllenhaal certainly looks the part — he’s as ripped and cut as he was in “Southpaw” — though he gives Dalton a boyish, bemused quality that seems at odds with his inner animal. “Is this a date?” he asks Ellie — words that Swayze’s Dalton never would have uttered.

Fortunately, Liman is such a skilled director that he could turn Macaulay Culkin into an action hero. Liman’s first “Bourne” movie (and Paul Greengrass’ second) arguably ushered in today’s highly choreographed action sequences, in which the camera becomes part of the dance. Here, Liman makes you feel every punch — the bar brawls are great — and he throws in a couple of spectacular car crashes and a speedboat chase for good measure.

You’ll miss some of the original’s colorful characters (Sam Elliott as the droop-along Wade Garrett, Marshall Teague as the sadistic Reno), but there’s a new doozy here: Knox, a happy-go-lucky psychotic played by real-life UFC fighter Conor McGregor. With fiery hair and an evil grin, McGregor livens up every scene — especially the fistfights — and snags the film’s best line.

“Road House” has started its own brawls in Hollywood. Furious that Amazon wouldn’t release the movie to theaters, Liman blasted the studio in a guest column for Deadline. Gyllenhaal publicly disagreed: “Amazon was always clear that it was streaming,” he told Total Film. Meanwhile, original screenwriter R. Lance Hill (who writes as David Lee Henry) sued the studio, claiming it used AI to recreate voices during the actors’ strike. Amazon has denied this, but — according to Variety’s unnamed sources — when producer Joel Silver reportedly raised similar concerns he was fired (though he still receives screen credit).

Break it up, boys! We’re here to have fun — and “Road House” definitely delivers.

BOTTOM LINE The gonzo magic of the 1989 original is gone, but there’s enough bone-breaking action here to satisfy B-movie aficionados.

By Rafer Guzmán

rafer.guzman@newsday.com@raferguzman