Two Mom Crews hosts playdate for families with two mothers to connect

Samantha Rose and her wife, Jessica, recently brought their 18-month-old daughter, Mackenzie, to a playdate at My Play Space in Babylon for a metaphorical look in the mirror.

All the families at the inaugural Two Mom Crews gathering had two mothers. They came together to make new friends, to bond, and, perhaps most importantly, to see their lives reflected at them.

"We feel like being able to see other families that mirror ours is important for her, people who create some normalcy for families that are same sex," says Samantha, 30, a district manager from Deer Park, of her daughter.

RESPONSE 'OVERWHELMING'

This Mommy and Me — or rather, Mommy and Mommy and Me — gathering was launched by Erinn Furey, 45, a children’s psychiatric social worker from Deer Park, and her wife, Ivana Militano, 40, a bilingual special education reading teacher. They have a daughter, Arya, 19 months old. "Now more than ever LGBTQIA+ families need to feel supported, affirmed and safe, and we want our children to feel safe and loved and to see lots of other children who have experiences like theirs," Furey says. "I think a lot of us have been looking for something like this for a very long time."

Families came from Long Beach, Farmingdale, Bethpage, Floral Park, Deer Park and Northport. The children played in the colorful ball pit, with toy cars, and in a mock kitchen while moms chatted with sippy cups in their hands or a baby in their arms. Children’s picture books with pride themes were set out on a counter, and several families wore shirts with "Proud of My Family" or "Love" on the front.

Furey and Militano worked with Mamas & Minis Long Island, which reaches 17,000 members, to publicize this first event. Mamas & Minis helps facilitate specialized play groups for all families, says co-founder Nicole Tropiano of East Patchogue. "If you’re just looking for other moms of any kind just to kind of live in the madness with you and build that village that we found is so important, you can come to us and ask us how to host a playdate. We walk you through everything," Tropiano says.

Furey says the response to their free event was overwhelming. "We have got people texting us and emailing us. We even created our own Facebook group," she says. Two Mom Crews will host future events on their own; future events at play spaces are scheduled for 11:30 a.m. on June 1 at My Play Space in Babylon and 4:30 p.m. June 3 at Workshop in Wantagh, Furey says. For families with older children, the next event is scheduled for 3:30 p.m. June 14 in Heckscher Park in Huntington. Furey says she hopes to run events for two dads and other LGBTQIA+ families in the future.

FINDING COMMUNITY

Mothers at the event said they are seeking community.

"We just wanted to find other families with two moms, and some friends who have kids. Once you’re a mom, it’s a different dynamic," says Melanie Hlapatsos, 34, an operations manager from Farmingdale, who came with her wife, Daniela, 38, a restaurant manager, and their daughter, Alex, 2. They’re also pregnant with fraternal boy and girl twins due in June.

Nathalie Laureano, 41, an accountant, and her wife, Diana, 42, who works in human resources, of Bethpage, brought their children, Leander, 3, and Annalee, 10 months.

"This is very intimate, and it’s nice to share mom experiences," Diana says.

"Our little guy, he’s also curious about families," Nathalie says. "And we’re trying to teach him that each family is different, some families just have one parent, two parents, the different family dynamics as well."

Families left with gift bags of rainbow Goldfish crackers.

By Beth Whitehouse

beth.whitehouse@newsday.comBethWhitehouse1

Beth Whitehouse writes about families, parenting and great things to do with the kids on Long Island. She’s been a Newsday editor and shared a 1997 Newsday staff Pulitzer Prize for coverage of the crash of TWA Flight 800.