A pop quiz in honor of royal matrimony

By now you probably consider yourself at least a demi-expert on the upcoming wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton. Sure, you can chatter about the proposal (while on holiday in Kenya), the ring (that mega-sapphire once sported by Princess Diana), the church (Westminster Abbey) and the wedding confections (a fruitcake and a chocolate biscuit groom's cake). But do you know William's pet name for Kate? Or Philip's for Queen Elizabeth? Or some of the other idiosyncrasies that make the royal way of mating and marrying so darn . . . different? Time, then, for our quiz on matrimony and the modern monarch. See if you merit a front-row seat in Westminster Abbey on Friday.

1. When Diana Spencer considered calling off her marriage to the philandering Prince Charles, what did her sister say to coax her back from the ledge?

(a) "An heir and a spare and you're out of there."

(b) "He'll be tired of Camilla in a year."

(c) "Your face is on the tea towels, so it's too late."

(d) "Never trust a prince who doesn't have a pet."

2. Terms of endearment: Match the royals to their less-than-regal nicknames.

1. Charles and Camilla

2. Queen Elizabeth

3. Princess Diana

4. Kate Middleton

5. King Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson

(a) Duch

(b) "WE"

(c) Fred and Gladys

(d) Babykins

(e) Cabbage

3. Though she wore black for 40 years after the death of her beloved husband, Albert, she was the first royal to wear white at her wedding. Name her.

4. Even 55 years later, the gown worn by Grace Kelly, the American actress-turned-princess of Monaco, still reigns as the embodiment of bridal perfection. Who created it?

(a) Designer Oleg Cassini, Kelly's former fiancee

(b) Costumer Helen Rose of MGM, where Kelly was under contract

(c) Christian Dior, who considered Kelly his muse

(d) The House of Hermès, which later named a handbag for her

5. Before he abdicated to marry the twice-divorced Wallis Warfield Simpson, King Edward VIII was the Prince of Wales, the most popular and photographed man on the planet. As sartorially daring as he was charismatic, he popularized Knickers, Fair Isle sweaters, Glen plaids and, of course, the Windsor knot. What did the proper Prince wear to marry the woman who cost him his kingdom?

6. When it comes to royal tchotchkes, the Brits are world champs -- surely they deserve a gold medal for devising the royal wedding barf bag. Identify which of these is NOT a William and Kate commemorative.

(a) A refrigerator with a larger-than-life picture of the royal engagement hug

(b) Kiss-Me-Kate beer

(c) A tub of margarine stamped with a portrait of Wills and Kate

(d) Crown Jewels condoms

(e) His-and-Hers PEZ dispensers

7. Though Kate's parents boast a three-decade marriage, William's gang hasn't scored as well on the happily-ever-after meter. Which of his relatives never visited English divorce court?

(a) His great-aunt, Princess Margaret

(b) His aunt, Princess Anne

(c) His father, Prince Charles

(d) His uncle Prince Andrew

(e) His uncle Prince Edward

(f) His uncle Charles Spencer

Answers to the royal wedding quiz:

(1) C, (2) 1-c; 2-e; 3-a; 4-d; 5-b,

(3) Queen Victoria (in 1840), (4) B,

(5) A black cashmere morning coat and a pair of 4-year-old striped trousers,

(6) C (Oleo tubs were actually made to commemorate the first anniversary

of Diana's death.), (7) E (Prince Edward is still married to Sophie Rhys-Jones.)