'Gnomeo and Juliet,' in 3-D, naturally

If you're a regular visitor here, you're familiar with my penchant for garden gnomes. Just last week, you heard me gush about a quirky new book on the subject. As if that weren't enough, the gnome fairies are kicking it up a notch and putting those little red-hatted rascals up on the silver screen. You heard it here first: Gnomes are going to do Shakespeare (sort of) in a new animated film set to be released Feb. 11, 2011.

It's not a small, B-list production, either. "Gnomeo and Juliet" comes from director Kelly Asbury, who worked on "Kung Fu Panda," "Nightmare Before Christmas," "Toy Story" and "Shrek." And Sir Elton John himself is providing the soundtrack.

Regarding plot, IMDB tells us only what we can assume for ourselves: "A version of Shakespeare's play, set in the world of warring indoor and outdoor gnomes." But after a little detective work, I discovered that the film, basically, is my worst childhood fear realized. 

When I was about 5, my 11-year-old sister thought it would be funny to convince me that when I went to sleep, all my dolls came to life and walked around my room without my noticing. She was successful, and it wasn't funny. Just like "Toy Story" before it, "Gnomeo and Juliet" embraces the premise of my kindergarten nightmares -- when we're not around, those gnomes come to life and wear ninja suits and trash gardening equipment, then act all innocent-like when we come back. Oh, and there's a love story in there somewhere, too.

And I saved the best part for last: Voices will be provided by Patrick Stewart, Emily Blunt, Michael Caine and Ozzy Osbourne. Now that raises the madness to a whole new level. I just wonder how it ends, what with it being a children's movie and all.

Take a peek at the trailer below.