Parents should guide discussions on Trump assassination attempt, political climate, experts say
After the assassination attempt on Donald Trump, Daniel Akridge and his daughter, Addilynn, shared opinions that were similar and different. Credit: Rick Kopstein
Addilynn Akridge, 17, was in shock when she watched a news video her parents sent Saturday about the attempted assassination of former President Donald Trump.
She was at work at a bakery in her hometown of Huntington, and when she got home, she discussed it with her parents. They talked about gun control, which the teen and her father, Daniel Akridge, disagreed over how to address. But they agreed that violence was never acceptable.
“It’s OK to disagree with other people,” Daniel Akridge said. “What’s not OK is to resort to violence.”
The shooting at a Pennsylvania rally has left Addilynn uneasy. It reminded her of an active-shooter scare she endured when she was a second-grader in Utah.
She’s concerned over what will happen next. And it reinforced her worry over safety in public spaces as part of a generation that grew up “in a post-Columbine, post-Parkland world,” she said, referring to the two mass school shootings.
“In schools, we did drills so often,” Addilynn said. “I still can’t go into a place and not [know] where I can hide.”
After the attack on Trump, which injured him and two bystanders and killed another man, parents like Daniel are faced with fresh questions such as Addilynn’s over public safety and tensions over disagreements in a volatile political climate.
“Talking to children about threatening events in the world is a balancing act,” said Kristin Bernard, an associate professor of psychology at Stony Brook University. “It's important to be reassuring yet open, which is hard to do sometimes when it's an event that's also affecting us adults in an emotional way.”
While they hold different political views, Daniel Akridge, a moderate conservative, and his daughter, a Democrat, agreed on keeping an open mind.
“He always said: ‘While I may not agree with you, I will always hear you out,’ ” Addilynn said.
Here is some advice from education experts and child psychiatrists on how to navigate conversations with children about the assassination attempt and what’s to come next.
What might kids be worried about?
In the aftermath of the shooting, children may have layers of worries, from anxiety over election outcomes to general concerns over safety in public spaces, experts said.
Dr. Scott Krakower, a child psychiatrist with Northwell Health, said parents can suggest their children reframe their thinking. For example, if a child asks how safe it is to attend a public event, the adults could offer the very low statistical likelihood that something like a shooting could happen.
How do you speak to children about what happened?
Alan Singer, a Hofstra University professor of education, suggested letting kids ask questions, which could guide parents on what information to provide.
“You want to find out what they would like to know before you make assumptions,” Singer said.
Bernard said older children may want to explore the subject in a deeper way.
“It’s really important that parents are opening up those conversations, and also, as much as possible, letting teens lead those conversations so parents aren't imposing their own political views or assuming their kids know things that they don't,” she said.
With younger children, Bernard suggested parents communicate to them that they are safe and share age-appropriate information.
What else can parents do?
Krakower said social media can be good to heighten awareness, but parents should consider limiting their children’s time on the platforms.
“The problem is that social media is so catered towards what's happening, and now you're just going to keep seeing one clip of someone getting shot over and over again,” he said. “You need to make sure your kids got a break.”
Bernard said parents should at least monitor, if not limit, their child’s exposure to media as well.
“What you see on a news program or what you hear on the radio while driving in the car can also share the information in a way that's not ... developmentally tailored to what's appropriate for kids of different ages,” she said.
Dandan Zou covers education for Newsday. Previously, she worked for a community newspaper in Maryland and a personal finance magazine in Washington, D.C.
