From Farmingdale bus crash to NYPD Officer Jonathan Diller's funeral, these LI dogs have offered comfort amid tragedy

Jokes, oohs and cries of “They’re so well-trained” could be heard as comfort dogs Abraham and Beloved turned an adult day program into a party.

Wearing vests that read “please pet me,” the golden retrievers laid their heads upon laps and showed off their obedience training at the Long Island Alzheimer’s and Dementia Center in Westbury.

The canines’ calm friendliness sparked memories of patients’ own pets and lots of laughter, like when Beloved — trained not to lick — instead sneaked in kisses with just the tip of her tongue.

“Am I your best friend?” Ann Kutch, 92, of Garden City, asked as she wrapped her arms around Beloved.

The visit was another doggone success for the K-9 Comfort Dog Ministry at Trinity Lutheran Church in Hicksville, part of a national initiative by Lutheran Church Charities to help the lonely, hurting and stressed.

Trinity Lutheran — the only New York church in the program — welcomed Abraham in 2019, followed by Beloved a few years later. Demand for their company has grown, fueled by the pandemic, a more divisive society and an increase in the stress people feel, ministry officials said.

The two dogs regularly visit assisted living facilities, schools and libraries and attend military gatherings and parades. They have also offered comfort during times of great tragedy, including after the 2023 bus crash that killed Farmingdale High’s band director Gina Pellettiere and retired teacher Beatrice Ferrari, and at the Massapequa funeral of NYPD Officer Jonathan Diller, who was killed during a traffic stop in Queens earlier this year.

“We’re a hurting society in many different ways,” said Donna Haines, who oversees the Hicksville ministry and is Abraham’s caretaker. “Sometimes people don’t know how to deal with their own grief. Being able to use a dog as a bridge to break down the barriers they put up is meaningful.”

ABRAHAM BIO

Age: 6

Birthdate: Feb. 1, 2018

Favorite pastime: Catching balls

Facebook: facebook.com/AbrahamComfortDog

Personality: Generous, smart, goofy; naps during sermons; writes on Facebook “I wuvs you” and “Happy Burfday”

Bible verse: “By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.” — Hebrews 11:8

129 GOLDEN RETRIEVERS

Lutheran Church Charities began its comfort dog ministry in 2008. The ministry uses only golden retrievers, a breed known for its intelligence, friendliness and work ethic. Currently, it has 129 dogs in 28 states. They have been deployed to offer comfort after deadly tragedies: the Uvalde, Texas, school shooting; the high-rise collapse in Surfside, Florida; the Boston Marathon bombing in 2013; and the Baltimore bridge collapse, according to the nonprofit.

Before being sent out into the community, the organization said the dogs, which come from select breeders, receive 2,000 hours of instruction, where they are taught to “love people” and feel comfortable in new environments. They learn the command “lap” means putting their forelegs and head on someone’s lap, and “rise” calls for legs on beds so they can be petted. The pups are trained to tamp down on doggie behavior like licking, to flop down for all-over petting and are desensitized to loud noises, such as bagpipes and a 21-gun salute.

There is no proselytizing during visits, but the outreach is intended to fulfill the Lutheran mission of compassion, said chief executive Chris Singer.

Getting a comfort dog takes a church about two years, an approval process that requires an outreach plan and enough parishioners trained to be handlers. At Trinity, for example, there are 14 parish handlers.

Abraham was one of the training program’s smartest dogs, finishing in one year compared to 18-24 months for most retrievers, church officials said. He was 14 months old when he arrived at Trinity, they noted.

When it was time to get a second dog, Trinity’s handlers took Abraham to the nonprofit’s headquarters in Chicago to make sure he and Beloved liked each other.

The two sniffed each other, wiggled and wagged. Getting along is important because under the ministry rules, comfort dogs can only hang out with other comfort dogs so they don’t get attacked or pick up bad habits.

“Abraham’s so good,” Haines said. “When she (Beloved) walks up and takes his bone away from him, he just gets up and goes to get another one.”

Sometimes-goofy Abraham, 6, lives in Copiague with Haines and loves to catch balls, while slightly mischievous Beloved, who turned 5 this month, stays with Laura Stengl, a retired insurance claims specialist from Hicksville, who often reads the Bible to the dog.

The two dogs will often work at the same assignments, said Haines, a Petco store manager.

“They feed well off of each other,” she said. “In visits, they may realize, ‘Oh, we both need to be with that person,’ or he realizes she’s with somebody and he needs to be with somebody else.”

And when their work vests are taken off, they know they can let their fur down, their handlers said.

At a recent visit to Calvary Lutheran Church in East Meadow, Abraham and Beloved interacted with children from the adjacent nursery school, who are encouraged to touch the dogs and not fear them. Both patiently stood or lay down as the kids treated them like living pillows or their own personal pets.

But as soon as they were done, Haines told Abraham, “Free,” and as she and a parishioner shouted “Come” to the dog, he expended his pent-up energy by running up and down the church aisle, wiggling his back end.

BELOVED BIO

Age: 5

Birthdate: June 21, 2019

Favorite pastime: Eating tissue and grass, just like her littermates

Facebook: facebook.com/BelovedComfortDog

Personality: A Miss America with racks of colorful bandanas; an “investigator” sniffing every light post and hydrant

Bible verse: “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” —Ephesians 5:1-2

DOGS DON’T JUDGE

The dogs, which go only where they’re invited and offer their services for free, have served as a respite during times of heightened tension, Trinity Lutheran officials said.

“They say if you pet a dog, it relieves stress,” Stengl said. “They don’t judge people.”

At the Nassau County 911 call center in Hicksville, the operators “fall all over the dogs” after tough calls, handlers said.

Maegan Fox, founder of Project Thank a Cop in Wantagh, said she has seen marchers at slain police officers’ funerals smile after catching sight of one of the dogs and mourners stop to ask the handlers questions.

“They’re very good distractions that help you feel not so overwhelmed,” said Fox, who invited the dogs to Diller’s funeral in March. They were also guests at the funerals of NYPD Officers Jason Rivera and Wilbert Mora, who were shot while responding to a call in Manhattan in 2022.

And the dogs’ impact has gone beyond what ministry officials imagined.

As the Farmingdale community reeled from last year’s deadly bus crash, the golden retrievers and other therapy dogs converged on the high school, with some staying for weeks, said district Superintendent Paul Defendini. Their ability to make students feel at ease quickly paved the way for social workers and other adults to start conversations about the tragedy, he said.

Now, Defendini said he plans to propose the school district get its own therapy dog — or possibly even one for every school.

“When a student sees one of these amazing animals in a public school setting, it softens the environment,” he said. “It just changes the way they feel about being in school and that particular moment.”

DOGS ‘READ’ THE MOOD

Abraham’s instincts have impressed Dorothy Schiller, director of therapeutic recreation for Central Island Healthcare, a rehabilitation center and nursing home in Plainview that the dog visits twice a month.

She said the golden retriever can “read” residents: “He can pick up on their mood and put a snout on their hand and read how much love they need.”

Wherever they go, the retrievers seem to know who needs comforting, pulling their handlers to them then “leaning” their bodies into them, Haines said.

At the Westbury dementia center, the staff use the dogs’ visits to sharpen clients’ memories and cognitive skills, said Gia Mannone, director of day program services. “It brings thought-provoking questions to our participants: ‘How old is he, what’s his favorite treat, does he like belly rubs?’ They just find through the dogs a way to connect and relate, and it just brings up memories.”

UNITING A PARISH

At Trinity Lutheran, several parishioners said the dogs have blessed the church by helping them to forge tighter bonds with one another.

For Abraham’s tennis ball-themed birthday in February, church members were given canisters containing balls. They were asked to give the balls to their favorite dogs, then fill the containers with toiletries for the homeless. More than 75 containers came back full, Haines said.

“At first, I think people thought we just had a dog hanging out,” said Nicole De Castri, 49, of Jericho, who coordinates supplies for the ministry’s assignments. “But when we showed we’re going to all these places . . . they feel more connected, and they see that we’re trying to spread the love.”

Hicksville couple Paul and Francine Gugliotta said they didn’t know many parishioners well until they signed up to be handlers for the dogs.

“We became a family,” the husband said of the ministry members. “We’re always feeding off each other and having each other’s backs.”

The handlers said they have been a support system for each other when visits get emotional. They call each other and attend monthly debriefings that Haines dubbed “Pinot and Puppies.”

Haines recalled the time a young student in an English as a Second Language class started sobbing into Abraham’s fur. Because the girl had been told dogs can keep secrets, Haines said, she lifted his ear to tell him that her dog had just died in her native country and she could not go back to say goodbye in person.

Earlier this month, the church hosted Beloved’s fifth birthday party. The birthday cake was for the humans, while Beloved chewed on plush, squeaky gifts “from Abraham.”

Advocates of the ministry say the dogs’ impact is powerful — and, at times, unexplainable.

Stengl said she will never forget one wake she attended with Beloved. Stengl kneeled and bowed her head in prayer in front of the coffin. When she raised her head, she said Beloved had her paws on the coffin and her head between her front legs, as if she too was praying.

Wake attendees asked the handler how she had trained the comfort dog to do that. She hadn’t.

“Maybe God was whispering in her ear,” Stengl said.