Families of hostages endure uncertainty even as hopes rise for a ceasefire in Gaza

KIRYAT GAT, Israel — Ilana Gritzewsky is fighting a battle against time to save her boyfriend from Hamas captivity.

While there appears to be progress toward a deal to free the remaining captives in phases, Matan Zangauker would likely not be released in the first stage since he is a young man. Gritzewsky is terrified a deal could break down or he could die in captivity before he’s freed.

Gritzewsky knows first-hand the perils facing her boyfriend, who turned 25 on Wednesday. She was kidnapped and held hostage for 55 days before being released during the only previous ceasefire deal a year ago.

“All the hostages need to get out,” said Gritzewsky. “If we don’t release all of the hostages — all the hostages in captivity — they will be dead.”

Many relatives of people held in Gaza find no reprieve in reports that negotiations toward a deal are progressing. The renewed ceasefire talks are just the latest twist in what’s been more than 14 months of anguish, despair and uncertainty about their loved ones’ fates. Still, they dedicate themselves to lobbying for their loved ones’ freedom, even as the world moves on to other crises.

“I gave my promise to my friends from the kibbutz in the tunnels before I went home. I told them I will do everything, everything I have to, to take them out from that hell. And I ask all the time: Am I doing everything I can?” said Gritzewsky, 31.

Hamas militants stormed into southern Israel on Oct. 7, 2023, killing 1,200 people and abducting roughly 250, dragging them into Gaza. The attack sparked an Israeli invasion of Gaza. More than 45,000 people have been killed in the ongoing war, according to local health authorities, who say more than half are women and children but do not distinguish between civilians and militants in their count.

About 100 hostages were freed in a brief truce in November 2023, while others have been rescued or their bodies have been retrieved by the Israeli military. Around another 100 have not been released, though Israel believes at least a third of them are dead.

In the deal under discussion, mostly women and older people are expected to be freed in the first six-to-eight-week phase, but many families of hostages are lobbying for all of the hostages to be freed at once.

Zangauker and Gritzewsky were kidnapped from Kibbutz Nir Oz, where they lived together, and then held separately in Gaza. Just before her release from a tunnel under Gaza, Gritzewsky heard from other hostages that Zangauker was nearby. She begged to be able to see him but was not allowed.

Two weeks ago, Hamas released a video of Zangauker, filmed under duress, where he described difficult conditions in Gaza and pleaded with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to strike a deal to end the war.

“He spoke quietly, but his eyes were screaming for help,” Gritzewsky said of the footage.

While it was a relief to see Zangauker, the video is no guarantee that he’s still alive today, she said. “I don’t want a photo. I don’t want a video. I want him here. I want all the hostages here,” she said.

The video brought back some of the worst memories of her captivity: the middle of the night interrogations, the filthy conditions, the lack of medical help for the injuries she suffered during the kidnapping. Gritzewsky's pelvis and jaw were broken and she has burns on her legs. She suffered hearing loss in one ear.

“What they are going through is physically, psychologically, and emotionally torture, day and night,” said Gritzewsky, wearing a hat that belonged to Zangauker that she rescued from their destroyed home. “I know the psychology that they use, how you don’t have water, how you don’t have food, how you don’t see the light, you don’t know what day or hour it is.”

Gritzewsky said she hates being in front of the cameras, telling her story over and over, reliving the worst days of her life, in a desperate attempt to raise awareness of the plight of the hostages and bring her boyfriend home.

Nonetheless, Gritzewsky has been a constant presence at protests and demonstrations across the country along with Zangauker’s mother, who has emerged as one of the most vocal activists for the hostages.

Einav Zangauker, who used to support Netanyahu, has virulently opposed his handling of the war and is furious at the government for not yet reaching a ceasefire deal, accusing it of forsaking the hostages in its bid to topple Hamas.

Netanyahu has said that the war must continue until Hamas is crushed and unable to rearm, but critics point out that Israel has already assassinated the top leadership and destroyed large swaths of Gaza.

Einav Zangauker, a single mother, has been relentless in her crusade, attending demonstrations daily, speaking repeatedly to every major Israeli media outlet, and even climbing into a cage that was hoisted high above a protest to hammer home the idea of her son in captivity.

She has demanded that politicians pursue a ceasefire that will release all the hostages at once.

“If my son returns in a body bag or body parts, I will not put you on trial, I will take the law into my own hands!” she screamed at lawmakers during a parliamentary committee meeting Monday.

While Gritzewsky is no longer captive in Gaza, she said she can’t begin to heal until the hostages, including her boyfriend, come home.

“Since Oct. 7, it’s like time stopped," she said. "You see the world running in front of your eyes, but your life is crushed like little pieces of dust.”