Justin Bieber is DOA on 'CSI'

 In the season premiere last September, someone was trying to bomb the cops of the Las Vegas PD, and the CSI focused on a kid named Jason McCann (Bieber), whom they collared at a right-wing separatist group meeting. They eventually targeted his brother, who's killed in a shootout near his car. Jason's grudge against cops just got a little grudgier.

WHAT THURSDAY'S ABOUT Dick and Jane Killer Nate Haskell (Bill Irwin) goes on trial for the attempted murder of Dr. Raymond Langston (Laurence Fishburne), whom he stabbed with an ice pick when Langston visited him in jail last season. Haskell represents himself and mounts a unique defense.

Meanwhile, Nick Stokes (George Eads) arrives home to an unpleasant surprise; investigators begin to wonder a little more about that nice boy, Jason.

MY SAY The 11th season of one of TV's legendary shows opened with an exploding coffin, cockroach swarms, a firebombed van, the Dick and Jane serial killer and Justin Bieber. (Most of this was pretty much before the opening credits.) It's almost as if the Legend were trying to tell us something, and after a careful assessment of the mayhem and the Haired One, that would apparently be this: Ratings are down. There is in fact shared a mutual interest for both parties. While the old warhorse continues to easily win the time period, its numbers have softened and it's not getting any younger after all. Bieber also has a movie to promote.

What good do any of these gimmicks do for longtime fans? Not much. Bieber's about as convincing a sociopath as SpongeBob would be in the role. Irwin's Haskell is still fun, but even this cackling, maniacal Dr. Evil act is starting to wear thin.

BOTTOM LINE You'll watch because you can't help it, but don't say you weren't warned about stunning gaps of logic or miscast superstars. By way of compensation, there is a cool scene in a warehouse.

GRADE C

SEE PHOTOSJustin Bieber through the years